08 ㅡ ♕ Mixed Up Vegetables

 

So here i am writing a blog with a mixed vegetables as my food-partner. I have no spirit to write here honestly. I have to admit that yesterday everything was simply fine and beautiful for me, but even though a lot more happy things happened today.....still, everything seems even more not fine and back again again again i feel super stooooopid. This mixed up feelings i feel is so tiring. I hate it. I don't wanna feel it again but, i still don't wanna give up and be a depressed girl and start to do something even more weird than what i usually do lately. It's not that weird but you gotta be shocked....trust me. or not.

Yesterday was perfect. Yes, perfect! The definition of perfect in my vocabulary is not different from what you can find in all dictionary. Perfect yes perfect. I couldn't stop smiling. I even forgot to write here yesterday, that's how happy i was nah.

For today.........................everything's super okay and fine, but suddenly all the mixed up feelings came and disturbed me. I feel mad. I feel crazy. I feel sad. I feel stupid. I feel lost. I feel messed. I feel like everything seems wrong. I feel- I don't know how to explain this brand new feelings of mine heol. 

h e o l, this is crazy man *shakeheads* 

It's late already because i still have classes tomorrow and i should take care of this feelings first so yeah caoooooooooooooo imma off to sleep.

Hopefully tomrrow's gonna be fine. Okaypls.

See you guys later, Bye-yeom!♥
Have a good day, lovelies♥

07 ㅡ ♕ Lost At Sea

Hmm...Today i seriously don't feel like doing a happy greetings *sighs* pls lemme just say hi quietly. "Hi." Okay, i feel sooooooooo sad today, everything's fucked up and idk heol i feel bad about myself too. I feel stupid. I feel lost. Lost in a deep deep sea. It's like i wanna runaway from reality and start to build my own fairytale. I know i can't but. It's hard indeed to exactly accept the fact though i haven't even heard the fact that happened. But i know....that fact is just gonna hurt me even more so i'd rather not to listen to it....sobs.

Hi, someone who smiles brightly everytime i steal a glance

Hello, someone who talks much everytime we meet each other's eyes

Hey, someone who jokes around everytime we meet

Those words are always gonna remain unsaid

I feel stupid.

I feel miserable.

I feel like a zombie back to life.

I feel heartless. all of sudden.

I feel lost. Lost at sea.

Everything's wrong for me

But, maybe...

Silently in my way, there's light

Deeply in my heart, there's hope

Madly in my head, there's you

And light....

Please lead the way. i beg you.

STAWPPPPPP!!!!

Okay before you say something, lemme say it first. YUP. I know i'm pathetic. I'm weird. I'm crazy. Stupid dumbass. thanks. and this is me.

Love Life is not always gonna standing by your side, sometimes you need to fight back and survive. I learnt it today. 

I indeed felt lost and empty the moment i thought everything's wrong, i cried a lot in my heart, i never needed a hug so badly but i did need that today, i felt like i didn't want to laugh on any kind of joke, also didn't want to even show a smile.

I went through all those things and i learnt something from it.

Sometimes you need to work harder to get what you want and also to make you cherish every moment in the future.

I admit that i don't wanna accept the fact, I admit that i hate it. But, i don't wanna lose hope and try.

If the one who cried later was me....that's okay. Cause at least i already tried as much as i could so then hopefully no regrets (:

*shy omona shy*

Good night!

Everything's gonna be fine tomorrow. Amen. 

Really???

See you guys later, Bye-yeom!♥
Have a good day, lovelies♥

06 ㅡ ♕ Khunfusing

Hello Everyoneeeee! Long time no see yeah so i have been busy with all the stuff and now here i am back again. Life has been super confusing for me lately hm that's why i came here otl so many weird feelings, so many abnormal things i did and idk why........everything seems so new. I keep asking myself but i still have no clue about the answer HEOL. Also i won't write the next episode of my fanfic on my previous post because i don't wanna remember every single thing that happened before but if you madly wanna know about the next episode then you can ask me to tell you the full story or not. I'm too lazy to write everything down.

Hi.... *for someone who doesn't even know this greetings is referred for you*

......someone help me.

I do???

See you guys later, Bye-yeom!♥
Have a good day, lovelies♥