Hi September! Please be good yaaah i beg u. So today i feel sick after attending the last friends party for 3days in a row. Hectic schedule nah friday, saturday and sunday mang, flu again and again. Feel tired, super. I even didn't go to school today. cannot see him. But all those party was super cool and awesome. I got to have lots of funnnnnnnn yehettttttt. Hmmm...anyway, the first page of my september diary is a bit sad. u agree?? I almost broke my legs last night because attending 3 party for 3days in a row. heels omg heels ok. I added another flavor of my panda eyes heung another black bubble tea lol. I sneezed for a whole day. Feel awesome honestly. Feel alive cause finally i can feel these kind of things happened after 15years of my life. If you know my story, you'll understand.
I look up at stars and my mind starts running, thinking about everything. Sometimes i wish i could at least have some chitchat with him, to make him realize that he can count on me. He can share something with me. He can share the pain and the happiness with her to me. That's okay. I'm a good listener. I'll hold back and stand by his side. That's stupid that's me. i'm not fine at all
Questions also running wild into my mind. How to make him realize? How to get closer to him? How to make him stop talking about me and the other one? How. How. How.......I wish i could just have all the answers right now. Stoopid meeh cannot think of anything.
I support them with all my heart. I never lie. I'll hold back and leave. I know. It's too complicated for us. I mean maybe for me only. I understand. That's why i called myself stoopid.
I'll comfort him if he ever sad because of her. I'll smile with him when he had fun with her. I'll laugh over his joke when she didn't want to laugh. I'll stand behind him and watch. I'll stand beside her and smile. I'll smile and laugh at myself over the stupid little things that he did for her, all by myself silently.
Thank you for being humble at me. Thank you for letting me feel this kind of feelings. Thank you for making me showing off my stupidness. Thanks dear.
She fell in love by chance and
ended up making a decision of her choice.
She worked hard to stay beside him,
even though it was hard for her to keep listening to all the stories about them.
She sometimes wanted to stop running and leave.
But, she still couldn't.
Have a good day, lovelies♥
